Yesterday for our church program we performed an amazing rendition of "Angels We Have Heard on High." It was so beautiful. There was a harp, a flute, an organ, and a piano. They were all playing different accompaniments. I thought I would be okay to sing it without being emotional BUT... I didn't. When we were younger my parents would take us Christmas caroling to the widows in the ward and Chelsie and I would always sing the alto to this song. We would try and mess up and laugh and she would always ask to sing this song because it was about her..."in ex (chel sie) dio." It just reminds me of her. So back to church... I really thought I was getting better at not losing it every time I am reminded of her. It has been 18 months! But as I listened to this amazing song. I really felt like she would have been there with me singing the alto part. It was so surreal. It felt like there really were Angels on High singing with us. Just her way, I guess of letting me know she is still here.
I'm sure she WAS singing with you. That's so funny about the chelsie song... Gray's little girl, Sadie thinks the same thing about the alphabet song... A B (Sadie) E F G... cute huh?!
ReplyDeleteThat's sweet, Taneil...made me tear up. I'm sure Chels is close by your sweet little family way more than you realize.
ReplyDeleteWe need that sometimes - that little glimps of what this is all about. I think they are closer - more of the time - than we know. In the every-day-aspect I think this gets easier - but when they should be there - when you EXPECT them because it is how it has always been - and how it should be...I don't think that will ever get easier. And, as they say, The Song Remembers When. At Kevin's funeral I quoted the hymn "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day" where it says - God is not dead, nor does he sleep. I said that I was sure that Kevin was not "dead" somewhere and that he wasn't sleeping but merely changing missions. But guess what? I still can't sing that song - especially with his Birthday so close to Christmas - without having a mini (yeah right) meltdown. So melt. It will be okay. Let the angels round about you bear you up.
ReplyDeleteWell, I have a lump in my throat thinking of Chelsie and your family. She sure is loved and I'm sure she is near. Thanks for sharing your tender feelings. Love you, Deena
ReplyDeleteWhat a very sweet post. I would have loved to be there in your sacrament meeting that day...listening to you sing and to feel your little angel sisters spirit! So sweet!
ReplyDeleteWhat beautiful memories of your sister & what a beautiful song to remember her by!
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