Just thinking....

Do you ever think about what happens when we die? What do you do on the other side? I wonder if you are still doing callings, or living in family groups? Do they still go to church? Do they still have struggles? I have alot of beliefs but sometimes I want proof!!! Sometimes when I think of my sister Chelsie I have such peaceful feelings. I think she must be here but its nothing like I thought it would be like when someone you know very well dies. I thought you would be able to recognize their familiar spirit. But it is not really like that for me. Sometimes I feel the spirit so strong and I think that she must be trying to tell me things. But I am not very good at it.

Today in church I sat behind these two sisters. One of the sisters was probably 16 or so and her little sister was about 5 or 6. You could just see how much they loved each other. I had a hard time concentrating on the speakers because the memories just came flooding back. When I was a teenager she was my motivation to be good. Just seeing how much she adored and looked up to me helped me to make good choices. I would never disappoint her! She was my baby! I thought I raised her and my Mom always let me think that. (Even though after having my own kids I realized all the work that you do for your kids) She was such a blessing in my life. She unified our family. She helped me in ways that I never realized until she was gone.
I wonder if she is as lonely as we are for her. I'm sure she has loved ones there but not us. Does she feel the "ache" like we do? Is she with us alot or too busy with other responsibilities. I know she is happy. That much I know! But sometimes I am happy too although the ache just never goes away.




I think I would do just about anything to see her again. I wish I could just talk to her for a few minutes, ask her a few questions, laugh about funny things, cry about some sad things, and just be with her. I miss her so much. Someday....

Wait...I can't find my keys!!!

My little 3 year old is a pack rat! There is no other way to describe it! Every night I clean up his "pile" and the next day there is another one somewhere else. He is so funny! He will put anything he can put his hands on. I have cordless phones and when the phones ring I frantically look for his new stash! Because he always puts them with his pile! It is so funny!

When I pick him up from playdates or grandmas, we always have to find his stash and help put it all away. It is not that he even wants to play with the stuff in the pile, he just wants it in his pile!

I wonder how long this will last...I'll never forget when I dropped him off at my friend Mary's and he had his little backpack with stuff from his "stash". When I picked him up Mary said (as she held up a pizza cutter and a knife) "these were in his backpack"! Remember that Mary? I think he was two years old!

OHHHH! I better go figure out where he hid that EGG!!!

Old fashioned fun!

SO...my Dad is a self-proclaimed red neck! However, I would argue that he is a very ingenius and classy red neck!!! :) He gets these ideas and he creates them out of what ever he has. A fun game we play is "where-did-this-come-from". We talk about these "creations" and try to guess where the parts came from. For instance, there is a picture from my grandpa's house, a window from an old warehouse, a door from the old farm house, etc. He has warehouses full of extra things he collects so when he gets a good idea, he has the stuff already! Anyway, yesterday he invited us to come up to the new summer home at the farm. This house was his parents and grandparents house. They farmed a dry farm and in the summer the whole family would move up there to be closer to the farm. It is really neat because there is no electricity, no running water, or anything. A real pioneer house! But of course my ingenius dad has figured out how to hook up a water tank and hook up oil lite lamps. SO it is really nice.

It was so fun! He made dutch oven chicken, veggies and a chocolate cherry cobbler. It was amazing. He made this cooking trailer which has everything you can think of for cooking outside! Coolers, a grill, chairs and tables, stove burner, gas....everything!!! He likes to pull it behind his pick up and cook for family gatherings. Ingenius! I tell you!

I mean...who has a custom made outhouse? Of course it is red. All my Dad's stuff is red, it is his favorite color! I can't remember where he salvaged the toilet seat from but he saved it from somewhere!

I think my Dad really liked being able to cook us all dinner. We kept asking what we could bring and he just said "I got it all!" It was such good food!!!!

We took a walk down the ranch. I have so many memories of that place from when I was a kid. It is the beautiful part of Idaho. Alot of people have said that Idaho is ugly but I always thought they were strange because this was my memory of Idaho. The kids loved picking bouquets of flowers and seeing the river below! What a view!!!

This morning when my kids got up they asked if they got all their chores done, could we go back to the farm!?

May...

You know how in December...every day there is something that you need to go to(when you have kids)? I think May is another "December"! I am not lying when I tell you that we had something that we were supposed to go to everyday last month! It was crazy! I spent more time at the school then I think most of the teachers did!!! J/K But seriously I was there almost every day! By the end of the month, my littlest guy asked, "when do I get to sit at my desk?" (he doesn't go to school yet, but feels pretty comfortable there!) So here are a few pictures of our crazy but fun month!

This is Princess Grace Kelly of Monaco! Their class had a wax museum, and all the kids dressed up as a famous person and gave a little speech when you pushed their button. It was really cool!

This is my oldest son square dancing. This was probably the funnest thing I have ever seen. My son is not one to have people look at him especially dancing with a girl! He tried everything he could think of to get out of this but to no avail! His teacher made him do it! It was good for him but very funny to watch his rebellous attitude while he was dancing!!!!

This was our Mother Daughter tea! It was so adorable! M just loved it! She was so excited for me to get all my surprises and to watch all the things they had learned that year! She is so cute and fun!

This is my baby sister getting graduated! She is so grown up! It is weird to see her getting ready for college! I loved being there!

So...there is a piece of our May! I guess until next year (or until December!) I think am going to lay on the couch and take a nap!!!

All I can say is ....WOW!

I know... I know...i can hear you all saying it!!!
WOW! You got a hair cut!!! WOW that was a huge change for you! WOW! Do you like it? WOW! Did you plan on cutting that much hair off? WOW!! UM..WOW! (This is what I hear all day..every day!)
And the truth is... no I hate it! BUT there is a little bald girl somewhere who will very soon be wearing my hair in a wig! SOOO it is worth a few months of torture and a little embarrassment while I figure out HOW TO MAKE MY BED HEAD HAIR GO WHERE IT IS SUPPOSED TO!!!!! yes....It was worth it!!
I wanted to grow my hair out while my sister was losing all hers. I saw the
heartache and the total devastation it brings when you lose all your hair and I decided that there was something that I could do. So for two years I haven't cut or colored my hair, then on Chelsie's 2 year anniversary I DID it! I know she is proud of me and happy that I can use my body for good purposes. SO... WOW! I did it!!!



PS I am not in any way suggesting that you all need to chop off your hair and donate it! :) I just wanted to do this for a memorial for my sister! It was really special for me.

It's Almost Mother's Day!

Well, it is almost mother's day and I was thinking about my mom. She is the greatest. The older I get the more my love grows for her. When I was younger, I would have never guessed that I could love her more each and every year. I think the one of the reason that I love her more and more is watching her be a Grandma. She is incredible! My kids adore her! One of the fun thinks that she does is make all her grandkids a homemade present for Christmas. The kids cherish them! I thought I would post some pictures of the Christmas presents that she has made for my kids over the years.




2004 Hooded Towels

These towel are well used... They are so cute! They have an animal on the top and the front shows the animals face. She also made a matching hand puppet to go with each one. They used them for dress up, baths, swimming...etc

2005 Body pillow

This was a hard year for my mom.. . These pillows are HUGE!! I wish I could have seen her making these! Remember, she also has 7 other grandkids besides mine (at the time she had 3 more to make than my kids) The kids love them, they always get them for watching TV or "stuffed animal battles". (Stuffed animal battes = riding them and running into each other)

2006 Build a Bears


This was such a fun year...Build-a-Bears were all the craze! She made each of the kids a Bear "shell" and included stuffing with a little heart to kiss and put inside. They LOVED it! She even made them two outfits to go with them. That Christmas was so crazy, I just remember her house was covered in stuffing and bear fur! :) It was awesome!

2007 Pillowcases

I didn't think that she would be able to do anything for the Grandkids this Christmas. This was the year that Chelsie was going back and forth to Salt Lake for Chemo and Radiation treatments. She spent most of the year waiting in the hospital. But she still made time for her gifts. These will always be special to me because it reminds me of that time when we all had to come together as a family. The kids won't sleep without them because they are so soft and cuddly.


This pillowcase is especially ironic for J! She loves it because it reminds her that Chelsie is still with her as her angel.

2008 head wraps

This was so funny. Mom and Dad went to Mexico and saw these cool head wraps that everybody was wearing. My little brother wore his the whole time he was there. She thought it would be so fun for the Grandkids to have them too. Yes, the kids thought it was fun too.
Isn't she wonderful! I wonder why I was so lucky to be her daughter!

Easter Fun!

Easter was fun! It snuck up on me and I didn't do much preparing this year. Thank heavens for the neighbor hood easter egg hunts and the quick dash to walmart, I survived. Here are the highlights:

This is D. Notice the determined look on his face. This years easter egg hunt was very serious for him. He is used to fighting for what he wants!! It was pretty funny!


This was really funny. My Dad called me the other day and told me he had a special surprise for the Grandkids. The kids were excited but nothing could have prepared them for this!!! This is the Grandkid trailer! He pulls it with the four wheeler, and if you look really close you can see that it is made from ski lift chairs! (He owns a small ski resort) He welded them on a trailer to pull the kids around. What a great Grandpa! They had such a good time at Grandma and Grandpa's. We played flag football, basketball, and had rides all day on the Grandkid trailer!

This was a sweet note that E wrote for the Easter Bunny. It reads:
Dear Easter Bunny,
Get these candies on the plate if you like them...love
PS Please do...
PSS I like easter.

He was really excited to leave something for the Easter bunny even though he told his friends that the Easter Bunny is not real! (COOL GUY!)

We painted eggs... It was really fun this year. All my kids got really creative and only one spilled egg dye cup. However it was red....


And lastly... and this is where the pictures end.... I was preparing a wonderful, fancy easter dinner for the rememberance of the Savior when I cut my finger on a can and had to rush to the neighbors house for 6 stitches. (Our neighbor is a good friend and an ER doctor) BUT it was worth it when I heard later that ALL my kids (including the 7 and 3 year old) were down on their knees in prayer while I was at the doctor. I wish I could have been there for that :)